When you're gone

I wanted to write a song like this, but I guess one of my favourite artist has written one even better. This is Avril's "When you're gone". Moved me to tears when I watched the MTV. Its so beautiful, and so real. The words are exactly the same I penned without melody. Its playing on my music player, have a listen. Tell me if you cried, cause I did.


When you're gone
Artist: Avril Lavigne

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie
Is made up on your side

When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you

I never felt this way before
Everything that I do
Reminds me of you
And the clothes you left
They lie on the floor
And they smell just like you
I love the things that you do

When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were
Yeah Yeah

All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I do I give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me
Yeah

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
And When you're gone
The words I need to hear will always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you


I'm over you.

Retreat!

The YA retreat ended just 2 days ago and I'm still in the mood. Lazing around and hanging out. Playing Xbox360 at my best friend's place, supper with friends. That's the problem when you have no work, you spend. damn.

The retreat I hope was a success, I mean people came and told me that it was good but I hope it did good in people's heart and God was pleased with it.

On Friday, I had to print out everything that was needed for the retreat and William helped me to settle them. Shaun, Yang, Joel and myself then went to ShengXiong to buy snacks and household products that was needed. We were done about 4pm and left church at 4.30pm to ALOHA CHANGI YACHT CLUB BUNGALOW B.

The place that we had our retreat was really old and truth be told when first opened up and went in I was scared. Its so retro that I had problem identifying with the place. Its scary cause it looked like some haunted house that you see in local dramas and the toilets are so huge it reminds me of the toilets from 'SAW'.

After trying to make the place look and feel like home, Joel, Shaun and I went to get dinner. We bought coils and repellents as there were lots of mosquitoes there. The speaker was on time and there were people coming in for the night session. Well, the night session was scheduled at 7.30pm but I think we started at about 8pm. As usual, the YA are late. The speaker, Ps Jacob Cheng was really good. He was very specific about his message and I really learned a lot.

After the session, we started playing board games and card games. Though I was sick and was supposed to sleep, I stayed up and played Loot with the funny people. Shaun, Ben, Jiawei and Ryan. It was super crazy, we played till 5am!

Woke up the next day at about 9.30am. Thanks to William who help made Milo for everyone. This time round speaker and people were on time. At 10.30am sharp we started with session 2. His words were again very inspiring, his testimonies and stories told us how great our God is. He left this words imprinted in my heart.

If there are people queuing for your church sermon, your Precher/Pastor must be very good.

If there are people queuing for your worship service, your Worship team must be very good.

But if there are people queuing up to attending your church prayer meeting, then your JESUS must be very good.

After I heard that I was stunned. These words kept coming to me even after the session. Pastor Edwin and Henry wanted to give us time to do our devotion/reflection hence they offered to get lunch for us. They bought nasi lemak and otah for everyone. It was very good.

After lunch some carried on playing board games and card games while others hang around. There were some other people who came in the afternoon to join us. At about 3.30pm we watched a show titled, FACING THE GIANTS. It was a very good show. Touching and inspiring. Really inspire me to be a teacher/coach not in the classroom type but outside the classroom.

William, Joel and Praba then went to get dinner for us. It was a sumptuous meal. After dinner Praba's family left with Val, Pam and Ben. Ryan,William and Andrew WX went to watch football. So only a few of us were left. The few of us; Jacob, Glenda, Lydia, Clarence, Joel, Yingqi and myself. Alvin Goh, came to find us and we decided to go out for some sorta supper and we ended up at downtown east Macs. I think I got high there, talking rubbish and laughing at nonsensical stuffs. High from lack of sleep, nugget, ice cream, ice lemon tea.

We went back about 12am and played some rounds of games then I had to pack up the place a little so that it'll be easier the next morning. As there were very little people left, William canceled the bus that was hired and it saved us $50.

We checked out promptly at 9.45am the next day and everything went very smoothly.

I liked to thank many people and God for this Retreat. Thank God for good speaker, for good money management, for good weather, for favour, for friends. Thank you friends like William, Shaun , Yang, Joel, Lydia, Glenda, Jacob who help with some operations of the Retreat. And the rest of the young adults who came for the retreat, thank you for making it possible and cause you came, there was a retreat! THANK YOU ALL!

Friendship

I'm just thinking of this cause somehow I seem to be losing people around me. Relationship of this level can be a shallow or a deep relationship.

I love hanging out with my friends. Really any group of them. Be it my secondary school neighbourhood people, Camp High Achievers (that one time at Loof was smashing!), church mates - they are all that I enjoy being out with.

Now it has come to a point that I meet many new people, but I lose many new found friends. Why? cause they come and go. I meet them at work and lose them after the work. No follow up, no other hanging out time. People from school, eg: Zhangde Pri, New Town Sec, Temasek Poly. I will lose contact once school is out. I feel sad. Sad that the life span of our friendship is only this much.

Lives that I might have impacted (esp those secondary schools that I was the camp instructor for) I wanna keep the relationship going. Being there for them if they need help.

National Service robs me of my best buddy. But friendship this deep is hard to break, just that it might sometimes fade away. National service also robs me of people that used to have lots of time to hang out together.

I sometimes imagine, what if I were to have a party say for my 21st Birthday. How big a group will it be? For family and friends... who will be on the guest list? who will I invite?

I have many groups of friends. I like to have more than just a superficial level of friendship with each of them. If time permits, if money permits.

To my friends of 20 years: Thank you for always being there for me. You guys have always been simply the best.

Just browsing...

I'm a sucker for beauty... and its hard not to be attracted. Working with Camp HA has given me an opportunity to meet many new people, colleagues as well as students.

I realised that I'm attracted to the extremes. I like both the soft and loud type of girls. Yup that means the 'gu niang', princessy type of girls as well as the sporty, and daring type of girls. So far the only thing they have in common is their eyes. I like girls who have eyes that can speak. Eyes that portrays emotions. Facial expressions that tells you how they feel. Is there a girl who possesses all 3 qualities? =P

Quote from a FEMALE colleague, "Eh instructor aLvin, every camp I always see you with girls sitting around you one leh."

I dont know her intention was to 'praise' me or 'suan' me. But she's a good friend of mine, I hope it was the first intention and not the latter. =)

But I guess I'll always be a girl's best friend, not a girl's boyfriend. But I hope there will come a time that this statement changes a bit. I love pretty girls. I do, I do, I dooooooo.

So she sailed away...

Yup, Rae's left for England last night at 2325hr. Not just her but the WHOLE family. There was a huge crowd at the airport. Really HUGE! so huge that we blocked up the entrance to the check in area. and there was quite a bit of tears flowing here and there. ok, maybe a bit is quite an understatement but yea I think you could kinda get a rough idea.

and on the side note, I smelt her scent today. am I missing her? maybe. Do I still love her? ya, think so. Enough for her to run back to me, enough to let her go and accept another.

Secret - 不能說的秘密

I went to watch this show with my polytechnic friends last night. Well, I do have a biased opinion cause I am a fan of Jay Chou, but in truth this is a really very nice and sweet story if you take it at face value.

True there are many loopholes in the storyline, many areas where we can question and find fault with, but he's only human. To think that he came up with the whole story, compose the soundtracks and then direct the movie, how's that for a 28 year old brain.

Well, this story is pretty nice, good angle for shots. The way things move around the screen, CGIs, all these details were very well thought of. I really like it so much I could probably watch it a second time.

I am reminded of my good friend, Andrew. I wonder if he would be like Jay Chou one day. They are very similar in quite a number of ways. Perhaps just the amount of talents God implanted into each of them.

Well, this show has definitely made me more determined to learn piano. Learning classical pieces and then putting them into pop/rock culture. Man, Lord I wish I could do something like that too.

I wanna get the soundtrack and DVD too!

Loof

Last night the 14 people from Camp HA gathered at Loof for a time of fun, laughter and DRINKING!

Loof is located at Odeon Towers Extension Rooftop, 331 North Bridge Road #03-07. Loof is a bar on a roof, a playfully versatile space which is multidimensional, split-level, and a juxtaposition of raw against refined. loof is designed as a refuge for the bedraggled office worker, a respite for the brilliant mind, a sanctuary for fools, a canvas for the budding artist and the launch pad for a brilliant night.
(http://e-clubbing.com/Reviews-req-showcontent-id-66.html)

Its a nice place with good views where it is located. Its simple yet nice and cosy. There are open space area, 'Caged' seat, 'Bedroom' seats and Lounge area.

I had a Kilkenny to start the session. After I had downed my Kilkenny, they decided to open a bottle of Belvedere Vodka. This is one of the best Vodka I've ever drank. Its so smooth you dont feel your throat or stomach burning. Its just smooth and you feel high cause of the quick shot taken. Wonderful! Loved it totally.

With the bottles in drinking games started. Its was damn fun. We finished the alcohol so fast that we had to order 2 more jugs of Whiskey Dry. Its was damn fun night of playing and talking and telling true stories of the bad things anyone has done. =)

I think drink driving is bad. I was so sleepy from the influence of alcohol that I had to switch on the radio quite loud to keep me awake. But it was quite a fun experience. I wasn't drunk nor high nor having a headache, so I managed to drive properly and safely home. Its just the feel of a heavy sleepy head that I dont like when I'm driving. But other than that, it was alright.

This is fun, hope we get to hang out more often!